I know you are listening, and I am not here to beg you, I am here to love you and let you know My father will be OK. He has suffered a lot, and I know he had made many mistakes in life ( we all do right?), so please forgive him, and I know that now is the time for him to change. And you have taught him a great lesson, and he is willing to learn now, so God , please give him this chance, he is a good man and he has a long life to go. God, I know I have made mistakes too, now it's time for me to learn too. I am ever grateful. I don't want nothing else. Just peace with my parents. And I know you are listening...he is learning his lesson so please God let me HEAL him, so I know I finally can do something meaningful for another human being--my dearest daddy, God, I know you are listening. I love you and ALL is well. He was very sensitive and he had a lot of anger, but NOW it's time for him to change, and he is willing. And I am helping him. After he comes here in the USA, he will achieve his perefct well-being. He is a compassionate person, and he has a good heart, he just did not know how to LOVE himself, forgive him, and teach him this lesson, and I know he will know your power as I DO.
Dear GOD, my father is in your hand now, please give him this chance to learn his lesson, he is a truly LOVING, KIND, Beautiful Being. God Please forgive me too, I was too moody and over-acting, now I know that only peace of mind can heal and can do everything good. Thank you God, Thank you Daddy, Thank you Mom, Thank you grandma, Thank you love, thank you lIFE. ALL is divine. And my daddy will go through this difficult time, cause I know HE DESERVES IT!
LOVE, from Niki
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
Witnessing: The Passing of a Legend—Michael Jackson
“Today is a sad day, because we lost a legend, today is also a great day, cause we got to celebrate, celebrate life, celebrate love. Celebrate the planet earth, cause each one of us who witnessing the history already becomes part of the legacy. And it will go on and on, and yes Legends don’t die, he never left. We are the world. We are the future. We are love. We are here to celebrate.”
“I don’t believe this world is falling apart, in a way, it’s falling together.”
June, 25, 2009, 3:30 pm , I was walking on Vine street just passing Sunset.
I was going to watch a show in Hollywood. I saw three kids were sitting on a star with a candle lit up and all. I asked them what’s going on, he said Michael Jackson is dead, “What do you mean Michael Jackson is dead?” he said yes, he died half an hour ago, “ No fucking way!! You kidding me!” “No man, that’s why we are here. ” I suddenly burst into tears, no fucking way this legend passed away. No fucking way.
I just did not believe it. I still don’t believe it. Maybe I just don’t want to. It was a shock. It was a shock for all. The world was crying. The world was in tears. I just could not believe it. It was like a dream, I suddenly fell into a black hole. This world is unpredictable. All kinds of things are happening in the world, and now you hear Michael Jackson is dead. It was not a completely surprise, but after a while it hits you, it hits you so bad, and you don’t even have tears. You become numb. It was just too unreal to be real. It was not the real Michael Jackson Star, but who cares? People got the heart. The real star in front of the Chinese theater was blocked due to a premiere, so everyone came here.
“Fuck!” how could this happen? This is really a world that nobody can predict. I was angry, I was bursting into tears. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it at all. Then more and more and people came, the news people too. People bring candles, flowers, notes, pictures…this is un-real! Of course I know who Michael Jackson is, I grew up with his music, since I was a little girl in China. That was early 90s. He became big in China since the 1990. I listened to him, first time I heard him on the radio, I remember everyone in my classroom bought his tapes, one guy was crazy about him, he said whenever he had to do an exam, he had to listen to him cause his music is like a battery, charging him. It was so true, Michael was part of everyone’s life, I saw people came, 50 years old, 5 years old, all generations were influenced by his music and his love. His is more than his music, like a person said in the card. A eight years old boy next to me, he asked me for a piece of paper, and he wanted to write something for Michael. So he did “Michael Jackson, Thank you so much for making music that we will remember forever, no matter what you will be the king of the POP forever. We’ll miss you so much Michael. –wills.”
Someone told me he was at UCLA in the last few days, he was at the LA film festival, well, two days ago I was there for the LA film festival. And I passed by UCLA medical center, I did not know he was there.
I sat on vine for the whole day, from 3:30pm till midnight. People coming and going, people crying, people laughing, people singing, people dancing. It was a great celebration. I did not want to talk, I did not want to talk at all. The only person I want to talk is NOT here. I closed my eyes, and put my hands together, and burst into tears. Silent pain. Silence. We all are temporarily on this planet, why fighting? why killing? Why hate? There is no need for that. Life is too precious, and Michael taught me how to love. how to give, and how to build a planet that includes everyone, it does not matter you are black or white, yellow or brown, we are one, and the world is finally awaking.
A guy said to me, I just saw your interview on the news, if everyone is like you, the world will be so peaceful, no war no thing. I said you got that right. I was thinking, the world was so different now, after a legend’s passing, at least in Hollywood. I saw people coming from all over, I saw all the bars and cars playing his music, that’s love, Michael , you taught us so much about love but you were being misunderstood so much. I just wish you received so much love while you were alive.
The history is gone. But not our hearts. Cause I don’t believe in death.
I was communicating with his spirit. I was kneeling down, I felt that was a special moment, special day, I felt God, I felt divine, I wanted to cry, I also wanted to laugh, the tears blended with the joy came out from my system. He never left. Cause legends don’t die.
I am not a religious person, but I believe spirits. Life is very fragile, it’s unpredictable. We are all in the same boat. Yes, the humanity. I was thinking about the destiny of humans, where are we going? This world is filled with chaos, violence, and greed. And the angels keep passing, but I don’t believe this world is falling apart, in a way, it’s falling together. I was speaking to the News, whenever people interviewed me I told them the same: Today is a sad day, because we lost a legend, today is also a great day, cause we got to celebrate, celebrate life, celebrate love. Celebrate the planet earth, cause each one of us who witnessed the history already became part of the legacy. And it will go on and on, and yes Legends don’t die, he never left. We are the world. We are the future. We are love. We are here to celebrate. Yes, we are here to cry, to memorize a legend, we are also here to celebrate, to celebrate his life, to celebrate his music, to celebrate life itself, that’s what a tragedy like this will do for us. When a star passing, we also see the light arising the horizon, cause we are the people, we are the Children, we are the future, we are love, we are life, yes, we are the world.
I was on Vine from 3pm till mid-night on May 25, 2009. It was such a beautiful day, we were crying, we were laughing, we were dancing, we were singing, we were celebrating. I read many personal notes, drawings, words, flowers, cards, it’s just such a beautiful day, people came together to celebrate, that’s what I told people, each one of us is part of the history, this only happens in our lifetime once, and we want to carry the torch. A eight years old boy told me he cried the whole night. I asked him where do you think Michael went, he said Heaven, I would rather believe what he said is true, when I look at the sky, I saw his face, yes, he is looking down, he is looking down at us. Yes, the physical body does die, but the spirit lives forever. His soul somewhere in the universe now smiles.
June, 26, 2009, 7:30am, I was at his real star. More people, more crowded, people came just to take his pictures, I wonder how many people are really touched by his music and was in pain cause this legend. I just could not hold my tears, when I saw more flowers, more candles, more drawings and pictures. I read each one of them, cause he was part of everyone’s life, and he will be. I wonder if he did not die, how many people going to listen to his music, and how many people will remember him, and how many people will take pics of his star? But today was a special day, he died, his star on Hollywood was finally revealed, and I was there to witness the whole process.
It was packed, candles, flowers, notes, pictures, drawings, paintings, everyone brought heir hearts. I did not take my camera, I don’t want to take any pictures cause I know Michael don’t need any pictures, he needs peace.
But Hollywood wasn’t peaceful today, the police let everyone get out the star, and they closed the star, so everyone has to wait in line to pay the visit. It was such a long line, I never see this in my life, I wondered how many people there were really in pain.
So Michael Jackson is dead, everyone was waiting in the line like visiting a museum, the memorial service is like a party, people take pics and go, but I danced, a guy brought a boombox, with Beat It, Bad, God, I love all his music, I danced my ass off. I would rather to dance off my pain, but I know it’s hard.
Most people came here for the big news instead of to remember this legend. Legends don’t die. He never left. Today is a sad day cause we lost a legend. Today is also a great day cause we got get together to celebrate.
A lady told me yesterday was her birthday, and Michael passed. I was wondering where he did go. I don’t believe heaven and hell. I would rather believe the spirit lives forever. It does not matter you are black or white. Personally I feel like Michael Jackson is a good person, he had a good heart, he tried to bring the world together, it does not matter your color, it’s the love to bring people tether, and that’s how he lived his life, through love and give. My friend Christopher recorded the Bad album with him, and they did the world tour together, he told me how kind a person he is. When the news interviewed me I told them Michael was misunderstood by so many people, I really deeply believe that his heart is innocent, he said he is always 4 year old. He is a child inside, he is pure and he had a lot of love, I was crying, at his star, I wasn’t the only one. Yes, that’s us, we don’t know how to cherish things till we lose it. I always wonder how many people going to buy his album and listen to his music, or care about him as a human being if he was still alive. Yes, death defines the fine line. I was writing a Chinese article about Plastic surgeries two weeks ago, in the article I was saying Michael Jackson wouldn’t live long because of his plastic surgeries. And two weeks later, now he passed. And this is not a joke, we all going to die someday, but our spirit going live forever. So today is a sad day, today also a great day, I suddenly felt I can do anything, No fear. Nothing to be afraid of. Since a legend can die, how about each one of our human beings? We can live a life with love, so when we die with no regrets. I wished while he was alive, he received a lot of love. Being a star was not easy, being Michael Jackson wasn’t easy, But Michael you did it. Finally you can rest, you already done what you were supposed to do. You had your pain, you had your love, you had your life, now the rest of us have to live our life, with hope, with love, with passion, with the vitality that he always put into his music. Rest, Michael, you are in peace now.
Amen.
Niki Yan
June, 26, 2009 1:39pm Hollywood
“I don’t believe this world is falling apart, in a way, it’s falling together.”
June, 25, 2009, 3:30 pm , I was walking on Vine street just passing Sunset.
I was going to watch a show in Hollywood. I saw three kids were sitting on a star with a candle lit up and all. I asked them what’s going on, he said Michael Jackson is dead, “What do you mean Michael Jackson is dead?” he said yes, he died half an hour ago, “ No fucking way!! You kidding me!” “No man, that’s why we are here. ” I suddenly burst into tears, no fucking way this legend passed away. No fucking way.
I just did not believe it. I still don’t believe it. Maybe I just don’t want to. It was a shock. It was a shock for all. The world was crying. The world was in tears. I just could not believe it. It was like a dream, I suddenly fell into a black hole. This world is unpredictable. All kinds of things are happening in the world, and now you hear Michael Jackson is dead. It was not a completely surprise, but after a while it hits you, it hits you so bad, and you don’t even have tears. You become numb. It was just too unreal to be real. It was not the real Michael Jackson Star, but who cares? People got the heart. The real star in front of the Chinese theater was blocked due to a premiere, so everyone came here.
“Fuck!” how could this happen? This is really a world that nobody can predict. I was angry, I was bursting into tears. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it at all. Then more and more and people came, the news people too. People bring candles, flowers, notes, pictures…this is un-real! Of course I know who Michael Jackson is, I grew up with his music, since I was a little girl in China. That was early 90s. He became big in China since the 1990. I listened to him, first time I heard him on the radio, I remember everyone in my classroom bought his tapes, one guy was crazy about him, he said whenever he had to do an exam, he had to listen to him cause his music is like a battery, charging him. It was so true, Michael was part of everyone’s life, I saw people came, 50 years old, 5 years old, all generations were influenced by his music and his love. His is more than his music, like a person said in the card. A eight years old boy next to me, he asked me for a piece of paper, and he wanted to write something for Michael. So he did “Michael Jackson, Thank you so much for making music that we will remember forever, no matter what you will be the king of the POP forever. We’ll miss you so much Michael. –wills.”
Someone told me he was at UCLA in the last few days, he was at the LA film festival, well, two days ago I was there for the LA film festival. And I passed by UCLA medical center, I did not know he was there.
I sat on vine for the whole day, from 3:30pm till midnight. People coming and going, people crying, people laughing, people singing, people dancing. It was a great celebration. I did not want to talk, I did not want to talk at all. The only person I want to talk is NOT here. I closed my eyes, and put my hands together, and burst into tears. Silent pain. Silence. We all are temporarily on this planet, why fighting? why killing? Why hate? There is no need for that. Life is too precious, and Michael taught me how to love. how to give, and how to build a planet that includes everyone, it does not matter you are black or white, yellow or brown, we are one, and the world is finally awaking.
A guy said to me, I just saw your interview on the news, if everyone is like you, the world will be so peaceful, no war no thing. I said you got that right. I was thinking, the world was so different now, after a legend’s passing, at least in Hollywood. I saw people coming from all over, I saw all the bars and cars playing his music, that’s love, Michael , you taught us so much about love but you were being misunderstood so much. I just wish you received so much love while you were alive.
The history is gone. But not our hearts. Cause I don’t believe in death.
I was communicating with his spirit. I was kneeling down, I felt that was a special moment, special day, I felt God, I felt divine, I wanted to cry, I also wanted to laugh, the tears blended with the joy came out from my system. He never left. Cause legends don’t die.
I am not a religious person, but I believe spirits. Life is very fragile, it’s unpredictable. We are all in the same boat. Yes, the humanity. I was thinking about the destiny of humans, where are we going? This world is filled with chaos, violence, and greed. And the angels keep passing, but I don’t believe this world is falling apart, in a way, it’s falling together. I was speaking to the News, whenever people interviewed me I told them the same: Today is a sad day, because we lost a legend, today is also a great day, cause we got to celebrate, celebrate life, celebrate love. Celebrate the planet earth, cause each one of us who witnessed the history already became part of the legacy. And it will go on and on, and yes Legends don’t die, he never left. We are the world. We are the future. We are love. We are here to celebrate. Yes, we are here to cry, to memorize a legend, we are also here to celebrate, to celebrate his life, to celebrate his music, to celebrate life itself, that’s what a tragedy like this will do for us. When a star passing, we also see the light arising the horizon, cause we are the people, we are the Children, we are the future, we are love, we are life, yes, we are the world.
I was on Vine from 3pm till mid-night on May 25, 2009. It was such a beautiful day, we were crying, we were laughing, we were dancing, we were singing, we were celebrating. I read many personal notes, drawings, words, flowers, cards, it’s just such a beautiful day, people came together to celebrate, that’s what I told people, each one of us is part of the history, this only happens in our lifetime once, and we want to carry the torch. A eight years old boy told me he cried the whole night. I asked him where do you think Michael went, he said Heaven, I would rather believe what he said is true, when I look at the sky, I saw his face, yes, he is looking down, he is looking down at us. Yes, the physical body does die, but the spirit lives forever. His soul somewhere in the universe now smiles.
June, 26, 2009, 7:30am, I was at his real star. More people, more crowded, people came just to take his pictures, I wonder how many people are really touched by his music and was in pain cause this legend. I just could not hold my tears, when I saw more flowers, more candles, more drawings and pictures. I read each one of them, cause he was part of everyone’s life, and he will be. I wonder if he did not die, how many people going to listen to his music, and how many people will remember him, and how many people will take pics of his star? But today was a special day, he died, his star on Hollywood was finally revealed, and I was there to witness the whole process.
It was packed, candles, flowers, notes, pictures, drawings, paintings, everyone brought heir hearts. I did not take my camera, I don’t want to take any pictures cause I know Michael don’t need any pictures, he needs peace.
But Hollywood wasn’t peaceful today, the police let everyone get out the star, and they closed the star, so everyone has to wait in line to pay the visit. It was such a long line, I never see this in my life, I wondered how many people there were really in pain.
So Michael Jackson is dead, everyone was waiting in the line like visiting a museum, the memorial service is like a party, people take pics and go, but I danced, a guy brought a boombox, with Beat It, Bad, God, I love all his music, I danced my ass off. I would rather to dance off my pain, but I know it’s hard.
Most people came here for the big news instead of to remember this legend. Legends don’t die. He never left. Today is a sad day cause we lost a legend. Today is also a great day cause we got get together to celebrate.
A lady told me yesterday was her birthday, and Michael passed. I was wondering where he did go. I don’t believe heaven and hell. I would rather believe the spirit lives forever. It does not matter you are black or white. Personally I feel like Michael Jackson is a good person, he had a good heart, he tried to bring the world together, it does not matter your color, it’s the love to bring people tether, and that’s how he lived his life, through love and give. My friend Christopher recorded the Bad album with him, and they did the world tour together, he told me how kind a person he is. When the news interviewed me I told them Michael was misunderstood by so many people, I really deeply believe that his heart is innocent, he said he is always 4 year old. He is a child inside, he is pure and he had a lot of love, I was crying, at his star, I wasn’t the only one. Yes, that’s us, we don’t know how to cherish things till we lose it. I always wonder how many people going to buy his album and listen to his music, or care about him as a human being if he was still alive. Yes, death defines the fine line. I was writing a Chinese article about Plastic surgeries two weeks ago, in the article I was saying Michael Jackson wouldn’t live long because of his plastic surgeries. And two weeks later, now he passed. And this is not a joke, we all going to die someday, but our spirit going live forever. So today is a sad day, today also a great day, I suddenly felt I can do anything, No fear. Nothing to be afraid of. Since a legend can die, how about each one of our human beings? We can live a life with love, so when we die with no regrets. I wished while he was alive, he received a lot of love. Being a star was not easy, being Michael Jackson wasn’t easy, But Michael you did it. Finally you can rest, you already done what you were supposed to do. You had your pain, you had your love, you had your life, now the rest of us have to live our life, with hope, with love, with passion, with the vitality that he always put into his music. Rest, Michael, you are in peace now.
Amen.
Niki Yan
June, 26, 2009 1:39pm Hollywood
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